If someone was watching my reaction as i hit the water, they would probably have noticed a few things. My eyes became fully dialated and panic overtook my expression, my breathing immediately ceased, and my body became tense due to the addrenaline rush. In fact, my face probably became red or blue, depending on how long it took me to finally breath. Can you blame me though? I was trying to break free of the historic/evolutionary training that i've lived with all my life, because people don't breathe underwater...unless they scuba.
Scuba diving was amazing. In fact, it was my own personal brand of Heroine (to quote Edward Cullen haha). I just went sky diving a few weeks ago, and i can verify that this was 10 times better! Sky diving was an adrenaline rush for sure, but scuba diving; scuba diving was like winning the super bowl. As a guy that never played football, i guess i should pick a different analogy.
The thing i liked best about scuba diving was that it allowed me to explore places i've never been before (yes, i'm an explorer by heart), while at the same time teaching me self control. Sky diving taught me that i have no control over the external things in life, while scuba diving taught me that i need to practice self control. When i dove into the water, my breathing stopped, and i had a brief moment of panic surge over me. I had to physically and emotionally force myself to breathe! In out, in out, in out. Then i realized i was breathing too fast, so i had to force myself to slow down. Then as something caught my attention, i forgot to breathe again, so had to force myself to begin breathing. It required so much self control: something that i needed.
Self control...that's probably the biggest struggle i have. I think fast, i act fast, i move fast. I don't want to be sitting around; i don't want to struggle. The ironic thing about a lack of self control, is that you can't fix it yourself. I mean, how does a guy with no self control, build up the self control to implement self control??? it's impossible. I've been blessed to have people around me help build up these characteristics inside my life. My pastors John and Doug, my stephen minister Luke, and now my scuba instructor i guess. Nah, i don't really think the scuba guy has any say over that manner, but scuba diving helps sharpen the saw (to quote stephen covey). It help me practice controlled breathing, which is the closest thing i can get to controlled behaviors. Let go of the things i can't control, focus on self control, and love the life i live.
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